This Toaster Takes Selfies -- Because Civilization is Doomed

October 31, 2014

Selfies have already ruined your nights out and your social media feeds. Now they're after your breakfast.

Toasted Selfies is a new novelty toaster produced by the Vermont Novelty Toaster Corporation that allows you to toast an image of yourself into bread. It is the invention nobody wanted or asked for, but if you need more WTF in your life it could be yours for the price of $69. And anyway, why should Jesus be the only one who gets his face on bread?

The toaster uses an insert made from a photo you upload to their website. Customers are limited to one face per toaster however (you can order addition inserts separately), so choose wisely. The company outlines some recommendations for how to get the best results and recommends 300dpi images. They discourage logos, however. Hopefully they are prepared for the inevitable flood of outright strange and sexually explicit photos they will be getting.

As an aside, if you're considering buying this we'd like to refer you page 9 of this excerpt from the DSM V that contains the diagnostic criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

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